Now that the rip and tear of Christmas is over, I can begin to share the gifts I gave which, this year more than ever, were the source of squealing, giddy anticipation on my part, as I imagined the (hopefully) giddy squealing of their recipients opening them and loving them as much as I loved making them.
The first is a gift I made for my brother-in-law, Chuck. Chuck is, incidentally a huge Chuck Palahniuk fan (Palahniuk is the author of many incredible novels but probably best known for the one that got turned into a little film called Fight Club). But calling Chuck merely a fan is like saying that Adam can be slightly disorganized sometimes.
If Palahniuk novels were women, there is no doubt in my mind that Chuck would divorce his beautiful wife, abandon his four children and run away to be with these numerous twisted Palahniuk-women in a gritty, ramshackle abandoned building, happily living out the rest of his days at the centre of some sort of strange sister-wife scenario wherein each novel/woman takes turns giving him sponge baths with humanfat soap.
So. What gift would you get for such an individual? It’s obvious right?
A cross stitch sampler!
I initially saw this on Etsy, but due to the constraints of the “Handmade/Secondhand” rules we had imposed upon our Christmas gifts, I had no choice but to make it myself.
I also bargained with Adam to get Chuck, because Adam drew him in the official Secret Santa draw. And by “bargained” I mean I did both Adam’s gift AND my gift because he refused to trade me. But I wasn’t mad because I made him do a few token stitches and so now in addition to having pictures of him watching Tinkerbell and the Great Fairy Adventure and pictures of him wearing makeup, my blog now also features him doing cross stitch.
Guys, I know it looks pretty kick ass now, but you should know (lest you get insanely jealous of my cross stitchery skills) that the back of that fabric looks like a rainbow vomited thread. And the two decorative scrolls are supposed to be spaced out further from the text. And I had to take out and re-do letters/shapes no less than three times. BUT! It’s done! And it’s AWESOME.
Chuck says he’s going to hang it in his office, I say that he will definitely be the most bad-ass motha motha in that office if he does.